


"Look at me!"

by FanFiction_Writer_3



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Fluff and Humor, M/M, Physical Disability, Shounen-ai
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-02
Updated: 2019-04-04
Packaged: 2019-07-23 22:54:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 16,559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16168496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FanFiction_Writer_3/pseuds/FanFiction_Writer_3
Summary: 【Type】Short story【Description】Sure not being able to see is difficult and there's always one person who either says you're faking for attention or just plain gets annoyed, but f/n, living his life blind ever since he was born, never really spent a lot of time complaining and has always been surrounded by people that genuinely like him and don't mind helping him out. Of course, having a good attitude doesn't mean you don't need help with a lot of things but his family is always willing to do whatever they can.Beginning his first year at high school, f/n's family did worry if things might start changing because students his age do tend to act a bit harsher toward people with disabilities no matter how severe or minimal, yet f/n still walks through the halls smiling confidently, and in the end even made a new friend he now spends every day hanging out with nothing ever coming in between them...until a misunderstanding occurs.





	1. Chapter 1

 

 

"Oi,  _watch_  where you're going~" Yuu nudged his elbow into his companion's arm laughing at his own joke while the other crossed his arms letting out a sarcastic laugh. "Ohh, is it one of those things where only the blind person can make jokes about their own disability but if someone else does it it's considered offensive~? You know, one could say it's the same with the short jokes yet  _someone_  keeps pulling that stunt on a daily basis." He scowled remembering at least once every day his friend lets a short-joke slip out.  _Bad enough everyone else gives me crap, now even a_  blind _person joined the fun..._

 

"I guess it is that way, but only if it regards you since I hate you so much."

 

"Pfft, you couldn't hate me if you tried~"

 

"I don't need to try, it comes naturally." He laughed when he didn't get a response. f/n l/n, a Freshman at ' _Karasuno'_ , the same school his elder brother attended but sadly graduated by the time f/n entered, and as you can already tell, cannot see a single thing. You'd think he'd act more introverted since you practically need to see to do anything in life, however, f/n has a pretty chipper attitude. Sure there are times when he'd get depressed for a period of time but f/n is someone who follows the motto "positive thoughts generate positive feelings and attracts positive experiences". Besides, he has family and friends that are more than happy to help f/n out in any way they can. "I'm just glad you didn't oversleep this time." He pressed his palm over Yuu's head he squeezed tightly. "You know how awkward I get when I have to ask strangers for help, you'd be in for hell if you left me all by myself just because you wanted to finish some stupid level on a video game."

 

"Ow, ow, ow! Th-that was one time! I-I told you I was sorry!" Yuu grabbed at f/n's hand comically crying at the brute strength f/n actually had. "It's time like these I wish we were in the same grade, at least." Yuu sighed after f/n finally let him go and they arrived at their-- f/n's destination. "Not only do I rarely get to see you during the day, our classes are so far away." f/n doesn't attend a "regular" class, as most would put it. Rather, he spends pretty much all day in one of three classes meant for students who, like f/n, have disabilities affecting their hearing, sight, or anything else that would make them incapable of properly learning without special services. 

 

 _It honestly isn't as bad as I expected. The people there are really nice, and the teachers are super helpful_. Walking into the classroom for the first time f/n predicted dull students being taught by teachers who only took the gig to get a pay-check bonus, but it all turned out f/n was letting spreading rumors get to his head. "How about this? I'll ask if today they could possibly let me eat outside class with you?" Not much time passed before Yuu produced happy sparkles radiating off his wide smile. 

 

"That would be awesome~! Oh, would it be okay if I invited some of my friends~? I kind of told them all about you and they wanted to meet you~! Don't worry, they're super nice and are actually curious about your condition considering you're the only blind student attending ' _Karasuno'_  right now~"

 

"That would be fine." f/n stopped walking upon hearing Yuu's footsteps halt. "It'd be nice meeting some new people, and if they have any questions I wouldn't mind answering them." He looked to his left where he knew Yuu stood and smiled. "I'll see you at lunch. Make sure you don't be late to class~" Yuu nodded even though f/n couldn't see it. 

 

"Mhm, see you later, f/n-san~!" f/n waved one last time before walking inside, immediately getting visited by a girl smiling contently. 

 

"Hey, f/n-san. I thought you would be late." Her words sounded strained, each pronunciation not fully spoken **[1]**. "Nishinoya-san didn't stay up all night again, did he?" Laughing first f/n waved his hand.

 

"No, we just got caught up in conversation. Didn't mean to worry you, Ryoko-chan." Said girl gently grabbed f/n's hand and lead him over to their table."Say, Ryoko-chan." He gently held Ryoko's shoulders to gain her attention. "You don't think they'd mind me eating outside with Yuu-chan, do you? He invited me to eat with his friends so I kind of hope I can. I don't know a lot of people here and meeting Yuu-chan's friends would give me an opportunity to expand my social circle." Ryoko pressed a finger against her chin thinking. 

 

"I don't think it'd be a problem. Nishinoya-san is very trustworthy and since you'd have someone helping you around the school it should be fine." f/n nodded happily. That's good. Although enjoying this class and the people, he wouldn't want to leave Yuu especially after spoiling him with the idea it'd be a definite yes. "But wouldn't Nishinoya-san be mad if you made those new friends?" 

 

"What do you mean? Why would he be mad? Yuu-chan is always encouraging me to talk to other people." Ryoko giggled a little further confusing f/n. "What's so funny?"

 

"It seems you haven't noticed...which would make sense, I guess. He must have shown it in a way you'd get it or maybe you just haven't noticed it."

 

"Get what? Ryoko-chan, you're not making any sense..."  _Why wouldn't Yuu-chan want me to make friends? Ah, I'm sure Ryoko-chan is just being...I don't even know what to call it...her being Ryoko-chan_. Surprisingly she acts just like any other girl whose friends with a guy: an absolute sadistic tease.  _Whatever, I'm just happy I'll get an opportunity to meet new people~! I hope I can make a good impression...and that my nervousness won't bite me in the ass when I say "hi"._

 

**~*~*~**

 

The bell set for lunchtime rung loudly throughout the school many students let out relieved sighs hearing causing instant loud chatter to fill the previous silent hallways and classes. "Finally, time to eat." f/n exited his classroom alongside Ryoko making him smile. "You're lucky, Ryoko-chan. You get to leave if you want while I have to ask and make sure I have help at my side. So unfair..." He hung his head depressingly. 

 

"You know I ever get to leave if I have to visit the empty nurse's office. At least you have someone, who seems to be waiting for you looking quite mad behind you~" Ryoko laughed noticing Yuu standing a couple feet away tapping his foot as his eyebrow violently twitched. "I'll catch up with you later, f/n-san." She walked away leaving f/n turning around remembering Ryoko mentioned Yuu standing behind him. 

 

"You're mad about something?" He tilted his head a second time. _Did I take too long talking to Ryoko-chan?_  Yuu turned his head pursing his lips. 

 

"N-no, why would I be?" A light blush overcame his expression. "A-anyway! Hurry up and follow me. The others are meeting us on the roof."  _It's times like these I'm glad he can't see me in an embarrassing situation_..."Y-you and Ryoko-san are always so close." Yuu watched f/n hesitantly continuing speaking. "I don't think you ever told me you guy's history." He gently tugged onto f/n's jacket to make him take a turn toward a stairwell. 

 

"'History'...? Well, Ryoko-chan used to attend normal classes, but even sitting in the front row she couldn't balance reading the teacher's lips and taking down notes. Around half-way in the middle of the first term, she decided to switch out into Special Ed. Ryoko-chan used to be a lot more insecure about herself and even couldn't read lips that well, another reason she had trouble in class, but now she's a total master at reading lips. The person helping her with learning how to write quickly and matching the line without looking down is making great progress, too. I'm really proud she's doing a lot better both at this and her self-image~" 

 

"The way you're talking makes it seem like you like her." Yuu spat out this time grabbing f/n's wrist to take another turn up a different stair path. "Do you?" He stared back at f/n frowning a little waiting for what answer he might give.  _He wouldn't know, obviously, but Ryoko-san is beautiful...if they were a couple I'm sure guys would envy f/n_. 

 

"E-eh? I mean, Ryoko-chan is nice, but I see her as only a friend."  _Yuu-chan...did sound a little mad. Perhaps it's because he thought I would get a girlfriend before he could~_  f/n let out a short laugh. "Man, Yuu-chan, no need to get so worked up. Ryoko-chan is a friend, nothing else."

 

"I-I wasn't getting worked up!"

 

"Then why are you squeezing my arm?"

 

"A-ah! I am not!" He quickly let go. They've already reached the rooftop. "A-anyway, we're here. I hope you get along with my friends. They're cool and said if you ever wanted to you could come to the gym someday after school while we're practicing. I remember you saying hearing other people move around a lot is fun."  _I'm a little sad he wouldn't be able to see me in real life action..th-that would be nice_. Yuu's blush reappeared imaging the kind of praise he would get if f/n watched him sprint around the gymnasium floor defending his team. 

 

"I'm surprised you remembered."  _Yuu-chan acts childish but there are times he acts like a mature parent when it comes to helping me out_. They walked onto the roof's floor where around the corner three other males sat, two on a bench and one on the ground. Yuu gently pulled f/n toward them grinning hugely after making both their presences' known.

 

"Yo! Sorry if we made you guys wait." The second Yuu gained their attention f/n's shoulders tensed. Yeah, he was never good with first introductions...or really talking to people. Not like he despises them, it's more he never knew how to make sure the atmosphere didn't get weird because of the other's curiosity toward his blindness and they're strangers to each other. 

 

"Took ya long enough~" Yuu released f/n's wrist. 

 

 _G-great, now I don't even know if I'm that close-by anymore_. His hands gripped his bag's straps completely unsure what to do.  _There goes my anxiety._..a _nd I really thought I could do this just because I felt excited to meet new people_.

 

 

**[1] = I probably failed at giving a clear explanation as to how Ryoko spoke.**


	2. Chapter 2

Ryuu violently noogied Yuu's head Yuu retorted by punching Ryuu's shoulder. Ahead of them, Koushi and Shoyou laughed at the two but simultaneously turned quizzically realizing f/n nervously standing still, almost as if moving a single muscle would create devastation. "Oh, you must be f/n-kun~" Koushi initiated conversation smiling sweetly. "It's nice to meet you. Nishinoya-san told us a lot about you. I'm Sugawara Koushi, a Senior." f/n jumped at suddenly being talked to but nonetheless smiled and nodded his head. Koushi's soft voice loosened his shoulders.

 

"Nice to meet you too, Sugawara-senpai. I hope it's all good things Yuu-chan said, he has a habit of saying whatever he can to embarrass me in front of others." At this, Yuu faced f/n again punching his shoulder.

 

"I do not! You're the one who does that all the time to _me_  as revenge for all those times I was late for walking you to class!" 

 

"Which means you deserve revenge. I told you earlier you should know I get self-conscious talking to people I don't know." 

 

"Why you!" Yuu's forehead popped out a tic mark. "Don't go picking a fight with me! After all the only reason you're here is to meet my friends you said yourself you were excited to get to know." Oh, that's right! And here they are bickering the way an old married couple would. "Besides, I want to eat before my food gets anymore colder. I begged my mom last night to make tempura, even dragged her to the store late at night." Sighing at Yuu's ways f/n took a couple steps forward he thought would be appropriate then sat himself down. 

 

"I did the same, but instead for hamburg steak." Ryuu moved next to f/n and slapped his back twice. "Call me Tanaka, Junior. I've been Yuu's buddy for a long time, glad to hear I'm not the only one who's stuck with him~" Queue an offended "hey" coming from Yuu. "Ahead of you is Hinata, he's a Freshman just like you so that means both of you should only refer to me as 'Senpai', ya hear~?" Ryuu gave f/n's back another smack f/n sweatdropped receiving. This guy is pretty violent, huh?

 

"Nice to meet you, f/n-san~!" Shoyouu excitedly smiled. "I was super excited when Nishinoya-senpai told all of us about you~!"

 

"Hehe, it's nice to meet all you." f/n scratched his cheek. "I got to say, I am a little overwhelmed...I've never been good with people so meeting all three of you at the same time is making it hard for me to really say anything...ehehe." Yuu slowly took a bite of his tempura watching f/n nervously laugh at the awkward tension shooting at his heart. Maybe he should've made it be him, f/n, and one of his friends having lunch together...

 

"I can understand that~" Koushi reassured. "Don't worry, f/n-kun, we don't plan on interrogating you. Nishinoya-san told us to be gentle breaking you in since he worries so much about your feelings during awkward situations~"

 

"O-oi, Sugawara-senpai! I-I-I didn't say all that!" Yuu quickly butted in blushing brightly the way Koushi put what Yuu originally said. "I-I just told you guys f/n-san isn't all that comfortable around people!" _He's doing this on purpose!_ Behind Koushi's sweet closed-eye smile Yuu could see the Devilish smirk as he made it seem like Yuu is exposing his deep care he holds for f/n.

 

"Y-you're so cruel sometimes, Senpai..." Shoyou sweatdropped. "R-right, f/n-san, I heard you attend a different kind of class, right? What is it like?" f/n gracefully ate a small rice clump thinking up the right words he should use. 

 

"Hmm...it's still quite similar to the classes you guys take. The slight differences are the rooms are smaller and the desks are two-person tables. Some of them have helpers, too. Like my friend, Ryoko-chan." Koushi caught Yuu's tensing hearing her name. "She's deaf but rather than relying solely on sign language she learned how to read lips. The lasting problem she had was writing while reading lips so Serinuma-sensei has been helping her balance the two. Another example would be Tadashi-kun. He has this condition that makes random muscles throughout his body tingle out of nowhere making him move around frantically affecting him from concentrating and write properly. Akira-sensei usually helps him out by giving him lessons on how to calm his nerves since the reason his muscles spaz is due to stress and anxiety. He's doing a lot better now, his hand-writing even became neater than how it originally looked. N-not like mine is any better, heh~" f/n modestly added. "I may have already learned to write in a straight line but since I can't see where I started writing a word I have to quickly form it before I start messing up and scribble all over my paper." 

 

"At least you're someone who can finish his work..." Shoyou rubbed the back of his head. "I can't tell you how many times I've had days to complete an assignment and I ended up rushing to complete it on the day it's due~" f/n shyly joined in the laughter the others shared. "Which reminds me, are you part of any clubs, f/n-san? Or at least is interested in any?" 

 

"There's not much I can do, really." f/n sighed but with a smile. "I've been told I'm a good writer, so maybe one day I'll join a Literary Club or something." 

 

"You knoooow~" Ryuu smiled evilly. Devil's ears popped out his head. "Yuu happened to have said once if there wasn't volleyball, he would join a Literary Club~" Hearing this be revealed Yuu spit out his food in shock. "Guess now we know why is so he could stay at your side~" 

 

"B-bastard! Th-th-that wouldn't be why!" He shook Ryuu back and forth glaring his white, angry eyes into Ryuu's deadpanned ones growing a darker and darker blush the more defensive he got. First Koushi, now Ryuu! He will kill the both of them if they keep pulling these stunts for the sake of embarrassing the shit outta him! 

 

_I don't know what's going on but I probably shouldn't ask_. f/n silently ate his food completely ignoring his friend's yelling. _Hm?_  He did look down feeling his pocket vibrate. _Who could that be?_ After turning up the volume a little f/n opened the message and brought his phone's speaker near his ear. "What...? He can't be serious." _Well, I would ask Yuu-chan_...His sweatdrop returned hearing Yuu and Ryuu still battling it out. _But he's busy_.

 

"Is something wrong, f/n-senpai?" 

 

"A-ah, it's nothing really..." _I guess I should ask_..."C-could one of you walk me down to the front of the school? There's something important I need to take care of, a-and it seems Yuu-chan is occupied at the moment~" _And I'm scared I'd die if I interrupted_. He heard shuffling, then a soothing voice.

 

"I could bring you, f/n-kun." Koushi placed his bento where he sat standing up ready to lead f/n. "I don't mind~" f/n looked shocked but smiled and stood up, first quickly packing his lunch and grabbing his bag. 

 

"Thanks, Sugawara-senpai. Hinata-san, you don't mind if we leave for a bit, right?" f/n looked down where he remembered hearing Shoyou speak. "It won't take long."

 

"It's fine. I'll look after Tanaka and Nishinoya-senpai~"


	3. Chapter 3

"Say, f/n-kun," Koushi spoke up noticing the awkward tension between them. Currently, they were walking down the stairwell from the rooftop's entrance. "I wanted to thank you." He continued before f/n could ask "why". "I noticed ever since Nishinoya-san met you, he's become a lot happier." His lips curled into a soft smile remembering every sparkle in Yuu's eyes when he'd tell stories of f/n to Koushi or Ryuu, the light blush that'd arise across his nose when he'd realize how long he's been telling stores of f/n; all in all, Yuu adapted a personality Koushi described as "the typical crushing school girl". "I must ask you: how do you feel about Nishinoya-san?" Koushi watched f/n's facial muscles twitch uncomfortably. _Surely he has at least a little clue._ He slowed them down a small bit.

 

"A-ah...well, I'm not sure Yuu-chan acts _that_ differently when around me...but, if he did become happier because of me, then, as cheesy as it may sound, I'm happy he's happy." Gradually f/n also smiled. "As for an answer to your question...Yuu-chan is someone I obviously care about. He's been around always ready to help bring me to class, to the front of the school where my parents would pick me up, and anything else I'd need him to do. I do have other friends, but Yuu-chan's hands are the only pair I'd trust putting my entire life in." Is that a confession? No, Koushi can't get too excited, especially if it isn't all much of his business to be meddling. 

 

"I see~" Koushi laughed. "As a long time friend of Nishinoya-san's, I'm glad you cherish him. Nishinoya-san cares about you a lot, too. He's even said it to me personally many times. In fact, I'm sure he'd be elated if you told him everything you just told me." True. If f/n was in Yuu's position he'd want a "thank you"...even though f/n practically tells Yuu that every day. Hmm, he can still tell Yuu the rest.

 

"Yeah, I will." f/n's body relaxed once more. "I already tell Yuu-chan 'thank you', but I don't think I actually told him how much I truly value him." And he's sure he should. _Damn, not like I don't enjoy talking to Sugawara-senpai, but I don't want to keep Akira waiting much longer_. "Are we almost there?" During their talk time flew right by and they already reached the bottom of the stairs. "I don't mean to be rushy but I do need to get there soon."

 

"Don't worry, we're close by." It does have Koushi wondering: is it a person f/n is meeting? If so, who is it? A friend? Family? Or worse--

 

"Crap, that's probably him..." Koushi could hear faint vibration noises which he guessed came from f/n's phone. Wait, did f/n say "him"? Who "him"? What "him"? Where "him"-- He should stop. But seriously, is it actually a person f/n is meeting? And if yes...Koushi doesn't want to think about it. "Are we there yet?" Unfortunately, they are almost down the next two staircases. 

 

"A-almost..." 

 

**~*~*~**

 

Eventually, they did reach f/n's destination. The second Koushi brought them in front of the school's doors he caught a male fairly young looking standing around. He wasn't a Karasuno student...in fact, Koushi never saw him before. Is this the person f/n is meeting?! _Oh no_...How could Koushi not have a bad feeling? f/n might not know it, but he is quite a looker and based on what Koushi could make out, this other male has high scores in the looks department. "U-uhm, f/n-kun, there's young male standing outside. Is he who you're meeting?" f/n's awkward shell turned completely opposite with his lips stretching wide. 

 

"Yup! Do me a favor and wait by the door? I promise this won't take long." Reason 1 Koushi was surprised is the 360o f/n's personality made and reason 2 is f/n didn't ask to be walked outside. 

 

"If you say so..." He opened the door for f/n to walk through, which he did, then picked up the pace of his walking speed without a single ounce of hesitation. The male noticed f/n's presence soon breaking into his own excited smile then tightly embraced f/n who happily accepted the hug.

 

 _What...is this?_  Koushi tried to think of this as nothing but perhaps two friends seeing each other, however, they were too far away for him to hear a majority of their conversation; a couple words Koushi managed to make out...though they made the entire situation shadier than Koushi already saw it. 

 

"I missed you so much! I should never let you out of my sight again!" The stranger continued keeping his arms around f/n's neck who sighed heavily with a smile. "Maybe I should stay with you as your personal care-taker. That way, I can make sure you won't get hurt, or worse, let anyone take you away from me~" Their lips curled into a cat-like grin when they said the last part. "I can't let my precious n/n-chan wonder around with strangers~! You'll never know who'll sneak up behind you and BAM! Your innocence will be tainted!" He rubbed their cheeks faster hearts practically shooting out his eyes. By now Koushi's eyebrows furrowed downward. He doesn't like this at all...

 

"You're so stupid, I swear..." f/n laughed punching a random body part of his companion. "And why didn't you wait until _after_ school? I was in the middle of meeting Yuu-chan's friends, something you know I have problems with making. I even had to ask one of them to bring me down here!" f/n produced an angry expression even putting both hands over his hips which soon turned into a soft smile. "Seriously, you're lucky I love you or I would have killed you for being an idiot."

 

"How _would_ you kill me~? Shooting a gun randomly~? Or swinging a knife in every direction~? Actually, I wouldn't mind seeing that~" Another punch got thrown. "Ow! How the hell do you hit so hard?! Anyway!" The next part Koushi couldn't hear since the guy's speech lowered but grew louder again. "Plus, I wanted to see you as soon as possible~!" And once more he hugged f/n incredibly tightly. "So shush and start showering me with unconditional love~!" 

 

"Give me a weapon and I'll show you how I'll still be able to kill you no problem..."

 

**~*~*~**

 

"Geez, Ryuu...you're such an idiot sometimes." Yuu scoffed finally ending their "fight" and sat back down. "Sorry about that f/n-- eh? Where did he go?" His head turned left and right robotically before it started spazzing noticing Koushi no longer was around, either. "A-and where's Sugawara-senpai?!" _If f/n-san needed to go somewhere he should tell_ me _!_  He clenched his shaking hands completely pissed off he wasn't the one with f/n right now, rather Koushi leading him around wherever they are. 

 

"f/n-san asked if someone could bring him to the school's entrance and Sugawara-senpai volunteered." Shoyou inquired Yuu's bright fire-y aura he created. "Is everything okay, Senpai? You look angry." Ryuu's Devil ears popped back out his head. 

 

"That, my dear Kouhai, is what we call burning jealousy." Shoyou nodded firmly acting impressed by Ryuu's general statement toward Yuu's current state. 

 

"D-don't be stupid!" Yuu glared at him blushing lightly. "I-I'm simply concerned! S-Sugawara-senpai is trustworthy b-but who knows what might happen to f/n-san! I'm always at his side keeping guard in case anyone might possibly try to create problems for him! D-don't act as if I have some ulterior motive! I-I only see him as a friend! I-I never once said I liked him as anything else!" The more he spoke Yuu's gestures became erratic and his blush reached his ear-tips until finally he shut himself up still glaring at Ryuu. 

 

"It's funny,"  Said male slung an arm around Yuu's neck. "Nobody mentioned you liking f/n-san deeper than a friend would~" A steam puff exploded out Yuu's face revealing his entire red complexion realizing everything he admitted. "Aha~! I knew there was another reason you were pushing the request to keep f/n-san calm and happy! You should have just said to treat him nicely because you like him, or better yet, you should have just eaten lunch with him alone~" 

 

"Th-th-th-that i-isn't t-true!" Yuu returned to shaking Ryuu back and forth, his redness not once fading away. "I-I-I said that b-because I didn't want him f-feeling nervous! I-it has nothing t-to do with the fact I like him--" He covered his own mouth using both hands. "Ugh..." Now creating a depressing purple aura Yuu covered his face. "I give up...you got me..."

 

"Hmm? I don't get it?" Shoyou leaned forward. "If you like f/n-san, why not tell him?" 

 

"Oh sweet, clueless, Hinata-kun." Ryuu dramatically sighed. "When it comes to romantic feelings you can't go up to the person you love and out-right confess. Instead, you got to make yourself look cooler than you actually are! Soon enough, they'll see you in a new, brighter light and see the confidence radiating in your eyes~" He said all this confidently, striking a pose matching his own description.

 

"But how would f/n-san _see_ all that?" 

 

` ` ` 

 

"Th-then there's option B!" Ryuu cupped his chin. "Which would be...uhm...y-you'd...w-well, obviously, after all confessing your feelings would be best! No point in keeping it bottled up!" Shoyou sweatdropped catching the parts Ryuu failed adding in only to copy what he said prior. "Okay, fine, our young kouhai has a point; you should confess your feelings. In the end, it'll be worth it knowing you let a huge weight off your shoulders."

 

"...it isn't that easy." Yuu hugged his knees against his chest looking over them sadly. "I...I've been meaning to tell him ever since a week after we first met...but after I saw him interacting with Ryoko-san, smiling and laughing...having conversations about their class...I...I realized I don't know what it's like being someone like him, like Ryoko-san, or anyone else taking those sort of classes here at school or anywhere else..." He looked down over at his hand. "Not seeing...I feel like I don't deserve to be with f/n-san...I-I want to be the only one he can rely on, ask anything for...a-and I'll never say no, but...I'm sure he'd rather have someone else who understands...s-someone like Ryoko-san..." Ryuu and Shoyou shared a look before smiling at Yuu.

 

"Come on, Senpai! I'm sure f/n-san isn't someone who'd reject you because you aren't like him." Shoyou raised his fists up excitedly. "By what you told us, f/n-san is a nice person who cares about you deeply." His eyebrows furrowed down slightly. "I can't say for sure he'd accept your feelings...but I _can_ say he won't stop caring about you~" 

 

"Don't get depressed on us just yet, Yuu~" Ryuu ruffled Yuu's hair aggressively smirking amusingly. "I swear, you brought down the mood big time! We'll be standing on the sidelines cheering you on~! If f/n-san doesn't accept your feelings, I'll beat the shit outta him 'til he changes his mind~" Except beating up a blind guy would look pretty bad out of context...or, _in_ context as well. "Whatever it is we gotta do, Hinata-kun and I will make sure you won't lose f/n-san, and I'm sure the Sugawara-senpai and the others would help, too~" First staring at his friends tearily Yuu wiped his eyes dry and laughed.

 

"I agree beating him up wouldn't look good, but I guess I wouldn't mind you forcing him to stay by my side~" Right! All Yuu needs to do is stay confident and confess his feelings. "Th-thanks, Ryuu, Hinata-kun! The next time I see f/n-san, I-I'll tell him everything~!" Both boys nodded their heads eagerly hoping nothing but Yuu and f/n ending up happy together. 

 

"We're back."

 

"GAHH!" Already?! That was way too quick! Yuu's entire body vibrated thinking so quickly he has to come up with a way he must confess his feelings. His face subsequently turned scarlet simply hearing Koushi announce they've returned...how the hell will he be able to even speak a full sentence without stuttering knowing soon he'll be spilling the beans he's been trying to hide for a long time? Ryuu and Shoyou caught on so they hurried to jump in to create a casual atmosphere.

 

"You guys made it back in time~" Shoyou grinned. f/n sat back down next to Yuu while Koushi went back over to the bench wearing a troubled expression the other three clearly saw, it obviously going over f/n's head. "A-ah, say, f/n-san! I'm curious: is there anyone you have a crush on~?" Yuu at this point turned paper white with his face still painted dark red. Ryuu gave Shoyou a thumbs up but scooted closer to Koushi.

 

"Wh-what suddenly made you curious about something like that?" f/n grew flustered at the sudden topic brought up. He turned his head away scratching his cheek. "Th-that's a little personal, don't you think? I never really talked about this sort of thing with anyone hehe~" He laughed awkwardly. "U-uhm...I-I guess there is someone I think of as very special to me...b-but that's it...?" The last part didn't sound sure. Ryuu's eyebrow twitched after finishing listening to what Koushi whispered into his ear. "S-sorry, I never really thought about this sort of thing before. I-I guess I never sat down and thought about it." _Please...someone change the subject_...

 

"C-come on, guys. You shouldn't spring such a topic on someone like that!" Yuu interjected. If there was a chance f/n has a crush on someone, he wouldn't exactly want to know during a time like right now. "B-besides, we should all start heading downstairs. I-it's almost time to get back to class, a-and f/n-san needs to be back early or the teachers get crazy worried, r-right, f/n-san?" His blush stayed put across his nose. If this conversation _did_ continue most likely Ryuu or Shoyou would try to induce hints regarding Yuu's feelings and he would literally DIE. 

 

"A-ah, right..." f/n was surprised by Yuu's intense interruption. True he didn't want to answer the question, but why did Yuu become so...he doesn't even know what word to describe it. It was _almost_ as if Yuu didn't want f/n answering the question -- but that wouldn't make any sense, so f/n decided to shrug it off and just be thankful he _didn't_ have to answer. "B-but it was really nice meeting all of you~" A bright smile, showing some awkwardness, spread over his face. "And thank you again for walking me, Sugawara-senpai. I hope I get to talk to all of you again~" Slowly f/n stood up keeping his smile pointed forwards he knew they were at least located near. "Sorry if it seemed we barely spent any time together...m-maybe another day we could eat lunch together again." 

 

"I wouldn't mind~" Shoyou excitedly agreed. "It was great finally meeting you, f/n-san~" Ryuu and Koushi finished their seeming deep conversation but they pretended nothing happened by smiling back up at f/n and Yuu. 

 

"Hope to see you again, f/n-kun. Make sure to take good care of Nishinoya-san, alright~?" Koushi's innocent facade is really going to be what ends Yuu...

 

"See ya later, you two~! And remember what we talked about, Yuu!" f/n tilted his head confused as Yuu's blush returned back to its dark red shade. 

 

"What did you talk abou--"

 

"I-it was nothing!" Yuu grabbed f/n's hand frantically. "L-let's get g-going!"


	4. Chapter 4

He pulled f/n away from the roof-top and all the way down the first stairwell then started slowing down once past the first case. _I-I_ _swear_ _I'm going to kill them! I-I know they were just trying to help...b-but how could I confess with all of them watching?!_  Will he even be able to tell f/n? Yuu has no idea if f/n is someone who cares about relationships or forming crushes -- he looked very uncomfortable when the topic was brought up and all he bothered saying was "I guess there is someone special to him" in an unsure tone. If that is the closest thing to liking someone...who is the person f/n thinks is "special"? "A-ah! Man, that startled me..." His phone jingled out of nowhere. "A-a-ah, sorry! Y-you don't mind if I take care of this for a moment, d-do you?" f/n chuckled. The same thing happened to him not too long ago. 

 

"Sure. I bet it's probably one of your friends~" He was right. Opening the text message Yuu received Koushi's name was written on top of the screen. But what could Koushi possibly have to say a minute after they left? If anything Yuu expected it to have been Ryuu who sent him a teasing/encouraging statement. 

 

**Contact Name:** _Suga-Senpai_

**[Tanaka-san didn't want us to bring it up earlier because f/n-kun was there so he told me to wait until you two were gone to text you.]**   
_Seen Tuesday, 12:34 PM_

**[After I brought f/n-kun downstairs he told me to wait by the entrance. He walked away and met up with a male who isn't a Karasuno student.]**   
_Seen T2uesday, 12:35 PM_

**[He looked a little older.]**   
_Seen Tuesday, 12:35 PM_

**[They were...touchy. The guy was clinging onto f/n-kun tightly, rubbing their faces together and referring to f/n as "his" and talking about wanting to stay by his side and not wanting anyone to take f/n-kun away from him.]**   
_Seen Tuesday, 12:36 PM_

**[The entire time f/n-kun looking unfazed as if he didn't mind it happening. He even said something about the male being lucky f/n-kun "loves him".]**   
_Seen Tuesday, 12:37 PM_

**[I didn't want to assume this was anything bad considering I couldn't hear their full conversation so what I've seen and heard was out of context...but...Tanaka-san and I decided it would be best if you knew, in case somehow you would run into this man yourself.]**   
_Seen Tuesday, 12:38 PM_

**[I asked f/n-kun who the male was, but he just said: "Don't worry about it, he's just an idiot who likes to bother me all the time" while smiling and laughing at the end. I don't want you to get hurt, because based solely on what I heard and saw...it's possible they might have a close relationship with each other...]**   
_Seen Tuesday, 12:39 PM_

**[I'm sorry, Nishinoya-san...we felt that it'd be important you knew.]**   
_Seen Tuesday, 12:39 PM_

**[What will you do now?]**   
_Read_

 

A shadow covered Yuu's eyes that didn't seem to have any emotion left inside them. _This...no way that's true!_  Yuu clenched his cell-phone. _f/n-san...f/n-san would have told me if he was seeing someone! I'm his best friend! H-he...he would have told me if he would to date someone other than_ ME _! All...a-all I have to d-do is...make him love me more!_  "f-f/n-san...is it true?" He quietly spoke up slipping his phone back in his pocket re-grabbing f/n's hand, softer this go around. Slowly they returned back to walking. "Do you...n-not really have a crush on anyone?" His eyes remained hidden.

 

"C-come on, not you too..." f/n bashfully looked away from where he knew Yuu stood. "Why do people always ask personal questions...? Especially guys...?" He let out a heavy breath. "L-look, it's complicated. Being blind...even if I could see, I wouldn't go by a person's looks...but either way, personality is hard to judge because not seeing means being more vulnerable to a person's secret motives, sneaking around in what is otherwise considered plain-sight. Even if..." He hesitated to continue the next part. "Liking someone is complicated, o-okay? Now can we stop talking about it? I really don't like talking about this stuff..." Whoa...f/n actually looks really hurt right now, more hurt than Yuu after reading everything Koushi sent him. 

 

 _Which means...he couldn't possibly dating anyone...still, it does leave the mystery as to who that guy is, then...sh-should I ask...?_  What the hell is Yuu thinking?! This entire time...ever since he's developed his romantic feelings toward f/n, Yuu has only ever thought how to make himself match f/n's standards, how to use a certain situation to his advantage -- this entire time Yuu has been nothing but a selfish bastard..."I'm sorry, f/n-san." Finally, he turned himself around and smiled softly. "I didn't mean to upset you. I...I wish I knew what it was like, to be you...but I will still say I understand what you're going through since there were plenty of times I thought 'what if I couldn't hear? See? Talk? Or even move?' I know it wouldn't be easy to go through, and I really do want to make everyday easier for you to my best ability! I..." Some pink dusted over Yuu's cheeks. "I really care about you, f/n-san...I-I...I love--"

 

"C-crap! Was that the first bell?!" f/n forgot his sad feelings the moment a loud ringing reached his ears. "Dammit, Sensei is going to freak out if I'm not there in the next three minutes! Yuu-chan, we gotta hurry or else we'll both be late to class!" 

 

"A-a-ah, r-r-r-r-right!" _W-was I really just about to confess?!_  Yuu realized everything he was getting ready to say before the stupid bell rang! _M-maybe I was wrong_...Everything depends on the situation and the mood. In the end, Yuu would be able to eventually tell f/n exactly how he feels and what he wants to be with the other male. _I'm still worried about what Sugawara-senpai told me...whoever that guy is, he obviously is close to f/n-san_. 

 

**~*~*~**

 

"Thank god, we made it in time." There was a moment when they were forced to begin running but it all payed off of getting f/n to class on time and there being plenty for Yuu before the bell rings. "You should hurry to your class now, Yuu-chan. I don't want you to be late...even though you have a habit for it." f/n teased his short friend since it's pretty much the truth. 

 

"Shut up...I'm not _always_ late to class...j-just...usually." f/n continued laughing. "W-well, I'll see you after school, f/n-san. Make sure you don't bump into any walls or fall down any stairs." 

 

"Don't worry I won't." Yuu went to turn around to hurry to his own classroom so he wouldn't actually be late and get in trouble with his teacher but an arm suddenly wrapped around his body tightly, at first a little hesitantly. "And thank you...Yuu-chan...hearing you say all of that before...it made me feel a lot better...I'm glad I have you in my life." f/n released Yuu's form and went back closer to the door his other hand held open. "See you later, Yuu-chan." Yuu stood there completely still. He...didn't expect f/n to hug him like that out of nowhere. And just to thank him? Must it be f/n doesn't hear a lot of people tell him they don't mind helping him with whatever he needs? Or at least they don't see him as a burden? Sure someone doesn't necessarily need to say it out loud the entire times, but still...

 

 _I...I really need to confess my feelings soon_...


	5. Chapter 5

Excitement rang throughout the entire building FINALLY ending the long school day. A majority of students literally ran out of their classroom as others calmly walked out yawning loudly. Normally Yuu would be happy because he gets to see f/n off during their walk to the front of the school where f/n's father would be waiting inside their car then head to the gym to begin volleyball practice...but right now, Yuu dreaded hearing the last bell of the day ring. Ever since lunch he's been thinking of everything that happened so far; seeing Ryoko and f/n together, hearing f/n's confession of what he feels toward relationships and love, and most of all, what Koushi told him he saw f/n doing with some stranger. Yuu was so close to confessing his feelings with so much confidence, but now...he feels like...like he can't give up now! Hearing what f/n said made Yuu truly understand what it is about f/n he loves, what he cherishes, and why Yuu wants to be there to protect him and make him smile every chance he gets.

 

Learning there are people like Ryoko and strangers who clearly care about f/n, it only encouraged Yuu to force himself to stop thinking "what if this" and "what if that" every time he comes so close to at least acting a certain way to show f/n exactly how Yuu feels. But as to why he dreads the day ending...it's because Yuu does plan on confessing, and despite sounding unstoppable, he's still super terrified...

 

 _N-no! I_ can _do this!_  Yuu nodded to himself hurrying out of the classroom before Ryuu could say anything. He pushed himself through the maze of students keeping a determined face from beginning to end repeating "I can do it, I can do it" in his head that got louder the closer he got to f/n's class. _I CAN DO IT--_  Yuu's feet came to a full stop. Everything fell silent, even distant student chatter became non-existence. It was reading Koushi's texts all over again; Yuu couldn't move a single muscle, he didn't even want to show his eyes after feeling a burning sensation stinging at his nose. 

 

"I don't even get a thank you for coming to you rather than waiting in front of the school~? You're so mean, n/n-chan~" f/n's arm was being strangled by another's...a male Yuu didn't know. "As payment for hurting my feelings, you have to treat to lunch I'll be taking you out to~" The guy took back one of his arms to grasp his waist bringing his other hand down to f/n's he intertwined with securely. All f/n did was give a deadpanned look.

 

"Then why the hell would I pay if you're taking me out? Aren't you the one who's always begging to treat me to a 'romantic date'?" 

 

"Then show your unconditional love for me~! In fact, why don't you just give me a big kiss on the lips~?" The guy pushed their faces close together, him grinning widely, f/n showing no interest. "I have to show others you're my territory one way or another~! I don't want anyone else taking you away from me, my precious n/n-chan~" Keeping their hands intertwined the guy wrapped his other arm around f/n's neck. You'd think with how unimpressed f/n looks he'd push the male off him, except a smile was soon stretched across his face and he placed his free hand over the male's waist. 

 

"I swear, you're too much sometimes~" Their bodies were even closer together than before. They both had smiles shining brightly, their hands all tightening from where they were placed on each other's bodies. "With the way you talk, people will take it the wrong..." Yuu's ear blocked out everything. Anything anyone said sounded like they were underwater, soon enough becoming nothing at all. He knew it...he knew it...he...he...There go the tears he's been holding back all day. They rand down thickly, overlapping the subsequent tear streams showing how long Yuu's been keeping them from escaping his eyes. 

 

 _I-I can't do it!_  Yuu's irises shook violently taking one last look at the "happy couple" walking down the opposite way keeping their hands held before sharply turning around and sprinting down the rest of the hall. _I-I was stupid thinking I ever had a chance! Th-there were already people who were there for f/n-san wh-when I couldn't be!_  Yuu passed by a couple students he didn't care if saw him carelessly letting tears drip off his chin. _I-I'm...I'm a_ fucking _idiot!_  He manipulated himself around a couple more students until he successfully reached the _'Karasuno'_ s main entrance. Upon reaching the doors he pushed his body outside where he continued running not bothering even thinking about volleyball. All Yuu wanted was to go home and lock himself inside his room never to come out ever again. He...he can't face f/n again. All he'll see is f/n smiling at someone else other than him, holding hands with someone that will never be Yuu...

 

"Nishinoya-san?"

 

"Yuu, wait up!" Unconsciously Yuu slowed his running hearing his friends' voices but overcame it and tried to keep running. "Yuu, hold on!" A stronghold kept him from running any further away. He refused to look up, not wanting to show Ryuu and Koushi his pitiful self. How could he...? After what they talked about, Ryuu and Shoyou cheering Yuu, putting all this expectation Yuu could actually go through with telling f/n his feelings...Yuu couldn't even get through asking what was going on between f/n and that stranger. "Yuu, what's wrong...?" Ryuu asked lowly and slowly. He has an idea why...he just doesn't want to jump to any irrational conclusions. 

 

"Nishinoya-san, talk to us. Was it f/n-kun? Did he..." Koushi didn't finish his conclusion. Yuu's shoulders shook. He can't hold back his tears no matter what he tried; they poured out his eyes uncontrollably alongside hiccups and choked sounds slipping out his quivering lips some tears ran over getting a salty tang all over his taste buds.

 

"I-I..." Yuu tried to get out. "f-f-f/n-san...th-the guy...th-hey...th-th-they...th-th-their h-hands were...th-their b-b-bodies w-were..." Neither sentences were finished or really said properly. Yuu's voice strained during each word pronunciation making what he did manage to get out unintelligible in Ryuu's and Koushi's ears. Koushi stared down at Yuu sympathetically, gripping his school bag tightly. Ryuu, on the other hand, turned his hands into shaking fists, staring down at Yuu angrily...but all his frustration building inside him were because of f/n. 

 

"That's it! I've had enough of this!" They're already outside and since f/n doesn't have any after-school activities he should be nearby. "Come on! We're getting this stupid shit over and done with!" Ryuu increased his strength his hand had around Yuu's wrist he pulled harshly forcing Yuu to follow Ryuu's footsteps Koushi nervously copied. He trying his best at stopping Ryuu from doing anything... _violent_. "Whether or not f/n is dating someone already, you are going to tell him everything!"

 

"W-wait, Tanaka-san! Y-you shouldn't do this!" Koushi tried reasoning. "I-it isn't a good idea! Forcing Nishinoya-san to tell f/n-kun his feelings...h-he just isn't ready for that!" Ryuu didn't respond. His eyes were squinted thinking what exactly he should tell f/n that'd induce him feeling guilty for dare making Yuu cry. "T-Tanaka-san, p-please calm down! Th-think how Nishinoya-san might be feeling! H-he's hurt, a-and if f/n-san is the reason why d-do you really think it'd be best having them be face-to-face? Especially with Ak-- th-the stranger there, too?!" Fortunately, Kou's words reached Ryuu's ears making him stop and loosen his hold on Yuu's wrist. 

 

"R-Ryuu...i-it's okay..." Yuu spoke softly adverting his vision down. "I-it isn't f/n-san's fault...and I-I don't hate him...h-he just clearly found someone he loves...a-and it just doesn't happen to be me..." His words stayed meek. Part of him wanted f/n shown the way he made Yuu feel spending all his time at Yuu's side only to hold hands and laugh with someone else...but the logical part Yuu had nagged him he couldn't let Ryuu hurt f/n for something f/n himself couldn't control. You...love who you love...and f/n...doesn't love Yuu. "Forget it, Ryuu..." Yuu's shoulders shook. "N-no matter how much I-I wish...f/n-san...h-h-he won't ever be with m-me...i-it was a one-sided thing...e-ever since...e-e-ever since I fell in love, w-with him..." Koushi put a comforting hand on Yuu's shoulder leaving Ryuu mentally fighting himself. 

 

"Dammit..." He dropped Yuu's wrist. "I don't like thinking he made you cry...but Senpai is right." _I'll still kill him if he dares shows his face around Yuu again_. Yuu might never confess to f/n which is why Ryuu wanted to push him. Holding in feelings isn't right, and Ryuu doesn't want to watch his best friend get heart-broken. "I'll drop it if it that's what you want. But if f/n-san makes you cry again, nobody will be able to stop me from beating his ass." _I won't hold back, either_. All he cares about right now is Yuu got hurt, f/n completely oblivious of it all leading him smiling carelessly adding fuel to the depressed fire. Seriously...even if he can't see...f/n FOR REAL didn't ONCE realize Yuu loves him? The way he'd stutter? Get nervous? Sweaty the second Yuu'd grab his hand to guide him somewhere? "Yuu...you fell in love with an idiot." Yuu didn't respond.

 

 _He isn't wrong_...Then again, it isn't fair to call f/n an idiot just because he didn't pick up hints bothering a topic f/n himself said he doesn't handle and/or understand very well. _B-but...maybe Ryuu is right...?_  Everything is staying confusing...Should Yuu confess? Should Yuu _not_ confess? Should Yuu ignore f/n? Should Yuu continue talking to f/n? Two opposite choices fly around within Yuu's mind making him become dizzy as to what he should do that will land him the best ending...but while he wants an ending where he's happy...at the same time, he wants an ending...where he's happy with f/n. _C-come on! I was...s-so confident earlier! I-I...should be able to still_...There's no reason Yuu should be getting all depressed! Shoyou...he was right when he said f/n wouldn't hate him due to Yuu not understanding f/n's "problem", and f/n never once shown any resentment or jealousy toward Yuu. Yuu...he really is the stupid one here. 

 

"I guess we should head to the gym-- whoa, Yuu! What are you doing?!" Barely letting Ryuu finish speaking his original statement Yuu roughly pushed past him wearing a stern facial expression Ryuu and Koushi stared at puzzled. 

 

"I-I'm...going to tell f/n-san how I feel! And if he doesn't feel the same way...i-if he already is dating someone...I'll still make sure he doesn't leave my side EVER!" _I **can**  do this! _

 

**~*~*~**

 

"Why did we take forever?" f/n groaned. They took ten minutes walking aimlessly around the school until finally leaving the building. "I may not know _where_ I'm walking but I do know this took longer than it usually does. By now I'd be half-way home..." He mumbled the last part heavily sighing noticing Akira's walking speed also decreased. "Don't tell me you're purposely dragging me around just for the fun of it? And be careful with your answer...I won't hesitate on swinging my fists randomly until I hit your dumb face." Akira laughed carelessly. _He's an idiot_... 

 

"Well duh! I want to make our time together last forever, my dear n/n-chan~! I've already failed at staying by your side since you were born because of stupid college, the universe gave me another chance by coming back and this time, I won't leave your side during our short duration of time with each other~" f/n sighed again though didn't mind a smile he unconsciously produced. Yup, Akira is an idiot, but a sweet idiot. 

 

"Whatever. Can we just hurry home?" _Today was an emotional roller coaster...I need some sleep_. Thankfully Akira picked up the pace. _One day I will kill him...then bring him back to life because it would be boring without his stupidity_.

 

"f/n-san!" A familiar voice echoed within the hallway f/n and Akira walked down slowly temporarily stunning both boys. Yuu? "I-I really need to talk to you!" f/n swallowed nervously catching Yuu's stern tone while Akira looked Yuu up and down then breaking out into a teasing smile. This is sudden. Doesn't Yuu have his volleyball stuff he's usually erratic to get done?

 

"Yuu-chan, what are you doing here?" Before either could say anything more Akira released f/n's hand to sling it around his neck and spoke up.

 

"Isn't it obvious~? Romeo over here ran around looking for _you_ ~!" Why would he do that? Just to tell him something? "And if you ask me, it might be a romantic confession~" Yuu's entire face exploded red. Even the guy Yuu sees as his enemy figured it out easily?! Unfair! What is he going to do? Use it to taunt him? Saying things like "too late, f/n is mine"? Extremely timidly Yuu looked in f/n's direction. When he did, Yuu saw something he's...never really witnessed: f/n was blushing. It wasn't as deep as Yuu's but it was light enough to recognize. 

 

"C-come on, Akira! Why the hell are you making such crazy assumptions?! Y-you'll get Yuu-chan weirded out!" f/n pushed Akira off him. "S-seriously! You need to learn how to keep your big mouth shut!" No possible way Yuu would need to say something so...ugh! Akira needs to shut up already!

 

"Aww, if only you could see it for yourself, n/n-chan~! Perhaps you should be the one to confess, hmmm~?" His blush first turned another shade darker. "My guess is you've been keeping little Yuu-chan here on the edge of his seat since you're too scared to admit how much you _really_ care about him~! I mean, you do talk about him a LOT~! I even remember you mentioning if you ever had to pick one person to rely on for the rest of your life, you'd want Yuu-chan, no hesitation what~so~ever~" Now f/n let his anger show. He grabbed Akira's head and began squishing it tightly. 

 

"Sh-sh-shut up! Wh-why would y-you say all that?!" Yuu covered his burning face with his hands; tiny tears pricked at the corner of his eyes. "You idiot! I-I'll kill you!" Akira continued smiling eventually slipping out from f/n's death grip. "Get back here! I'm not done beating the shit outta you!" He started walking backward as he said; 

 

"Sorry, n/n-chan~! I just think you two should talk things out~" Akira turned around, his triumph grin not faltering even a little. _I didn't want to embarrass f/n, but it's important they finally let it all out. Ahh, young love...it's a shame it's so stupid~_  Despite not knowing whether or not he was gone, f/n kept his glare where he heard Akira's voice extra pissed off his face wouldn't cool down. He really will kill him one day...

 

` ` ` 

 

It was silent. Shortly afterward f/n downgraded his glare...except either felt too humiliated to say anything. Yuu took his hands off but his eyes stared down repeating everything Akira said. _D-does...f/n-san...a-actually talk a-about me? A-and he wants to...r-rely on me all the time...?_  It is safe to say whoever Akira is, he isn't f/n's partner...if anything, it seemed he was pushing f/n into telling Yuu-- wait! f/n feels the same?! _M-my heart is racing!_  Yuu gripped his shirt. _I...I do need to say something! Originally, I was going to tell f/n-san no matter what! Now...now shouldn't be any different!_  He can't back out during his perfect chance.


	6. Chapter 6

"f-f/n-san...!" He clenched his teeth and stared up at his crush. "C-can...we talk outside...?! I-I really d-do have something important to tell you a-and...I want it to be...j-just us...!" _Stay strong! N-nothing worse than rejection can happen!_  f/n's face twitched subtly. Oh god! Will he reject--

 

"Y-yeah..." f/n slowly turned around. "I...think that's a good idea." Momentarily Yuu felt entranced by the way f/n looks, his face stern yet lightly decorated with his flushed cheeks, and his body standing straight. "Uhm...l-let's go. I...I want to hear what's on your mind." Akira's an idiot...but he reads people as if they were an open book...could Yuu actually..."Uhm, do you mind, uh...?" He awkwardly lifted his hand. Geez, must they get all awkward? 

 

"O-oh! Right..." Yuu grasped f/n's hand without trouble, however, became extra nervous the moment their palms collided. _Sh-shit! I feel like I'm going to pass out_. Deep, subtle breaths and Yuu should feel fine during their walk outside. _Don't lose motivation! Keep thinking of the good things that will result afterward!_  He gave himself different pep talks to keep him from chickening out like every other time Yuu would say he's ready to confess before he'd get overpowered by anxiety and end up back as nothing but f/n's "best friend". _I...I WILL tell f/n-san I love him!_  If Yuu doesn't...it'd be #1 proof Yuu doesn't, and will never, deserve f/n.

 

**~*~*~**

 

It continued being silent. Their hands stayed connected though sweaty, both thinking what will come out of the next couple minutes. Does the other really feel love for the latter? Does the other really plan on confessing? Unknowingly, their thoughts were perfectly synced, their nerves giving their bodies an equally tingly sensation running inside them. "Uh...that guy you were with seems pretty close to you..." Yuu brought up wanting final answers to almost all of his questions. "He doesn't look like a student...how do you two know each other...?" _Please don't let it be something simple and I had a huge episode for no reason_.

 

"O-oh, that's Akira." f/n let a small smile slip. "He's my older brother by 3 years. He usually stays in his college's dorms, but because my parents are working overtime this week, Akira offered to help me the way my parents typically would. He's staying over until my parents work schedules go back to normal." Seems Yuu lost his own bet. Older brother? He never once heard f/n mention he even had one! "He plays around a lot, which gets him a ton of trouble," No kidding. "But I'm glad he's back at home. I was super sad when I realized he and I wouldn't get to walk to school together since he'd be a Senior by the time I get into high school." 

 

"You sound happy you get to see him again for sure...~" Yuu turned his head _. I...still feel jealous_. His ears were tinted pink.  _D-does f/n-san get happy when we're together...?_  "I-I never knew you had a brother. I thought he was some random guy you were really close to..." He clenched his free hand before speaking again. "I-I'm glad you two are just brothers...with how close you two seemed, I feared it was something else." f/n's eye-lids widened suddenly hearing Yuu's confession regarding his inner-most thoughts. 

 

 _Sh-shit_...f/n let out a silent, shaky breath. "Ahaha...w-well, I guarantee you it was nothing more. I really value Akira as a brother, and I'd never trade him for anything else~" _Is he still jealous...?_  It feels like f/n is walking with Akira all over again -- they kept walking toward somewhere f/n assumed is a place he and Yuu could be far away from the school building even though there were one or two students leaving the premise. _Ah, he must be pulling me to the side_. For a while, they've been walking straight but Yuu turned both their bodies. He lightly tugged f/n behind a large tree their bodies hid behind the fact Yuu stood in front of f/n whose back faced the wood adding a helping hand. f/n had another large knot in his throat he swallowed. "U-uh, so what is it you wanted to tell me?" He tried copying his brother's careless smile, however, his nervousness showed all over his face. 

 

"I-it...uhm..." Yuu couldn't get the words out. He...feels so weird. Standing here -- actually standing in front of f/n with the only thought of saying the words "I love you" finally to f/n's face...it's like it isn't real, this all is some crazy dream Yuu isn't sure he'd want to end just yet. His vision is also getting shaky...this...this if FINALLY his chance to clear the air, even if f/n doesn't love him back...at least he'd let f/n know his true feelings. "L-look, I'm j-just going to say everything!" Yuu squeezed his eyelids shut, clenching his hands tightly at his sides as he ignored nausea rushing in his stomach and head. "I...I-I got really happy hearing how y-you'd choose me as the person for you to rely on for anything! I-I'm always happy I'm the one who gets to take you to class! Y-you..." _D-don't get embarrassed now!_  "You already make me happy all the time! A-and I was a little hesitant on introducing you to my friends b-because...b-because I didn't want you to end up liking any of them more than you like me! My number one fear is losing you, f/n-san! Y-you're the most important person in my life...a-and...I...a-and I-I..." Gradually his hands relaxed out of their clenched state, Yuu's posture became straighter following his blush calming down and his head looking down casting a shadow over his eyes. "I realized...I want you to be happy too, f/n-san."

 

All this time Yuu has been absolutely selfish. At first, he thought his crush on f/n immediately meant f/n must love him back without thinking that isn't what love is. Love is consensual, love is mutual, love is when both parties are respected and given thought about. Yuu did get the epiphany he's been thinking nothing but about himself before...except as of now, Yuu is truly figuring out and understanding he is in fact deeply in love with f/n. He'd be okay if f/n rejected him, if Akira was the one f/n loved, all of it Yuu would take actual time to think rather than let his emotions control him. 

 

"I really am happy you'd want it to be me you come to ask to help with whatever it may be...but I want you to know that isn't all that I feel...especially what I feel for you. I-I..." His voice got caught in his throat. When getting a noise out his mouth, it was only a cracked sob. "I love you, f/n-san, a-and...I don't want you to sugar coat anything. I-if you don't like me...I-I promise I won't hold a grudge and I won't ever use my feelings against you. I'd happily go back to being your friend." Was this the right thing? Yuu could have said a simple "I love you" and wait for whatever reaction f/n would give...instead, he talked to him as if he was confessing his sins during an emotional state. No...this is how it should go down, what Yuu's conceitedness prevented him from doing this entire time. _Should I say anything else...?_  f/n definitely been quiet. Honestly, Yuu has been pretty blanked out despite everything he said, f/n could have aimlessly ran away without Yuu noticing. 

 

` ` `

 

Quiet. The only difference compared to the other times, Yuu didn't feel tense. He stood still ready to accept anything f/n does or say, even if it's a hard slap to the face or kick in the balls, Yuu will take it like a man. A hand was lifted, and shocking Yuu into looking at f/n's face with shaking bulging eyes, it lovingly ran down Yuu's cheek then up and over his lips f/n spent additional time running his fingers softly across each lip. At that moment, Yuu's heart raced at an incredibly unhealthy speed gaining loud blood pumping running through his veins causing his face getting colored red and only red. _All this time and I've never got to get a good picture of what Yuu-chan looks like_. f/n let his hand fall back at his side. "I literally have no idea what I should say..." His eyes drooped, a small tinge of pink brightening his cheekbones. "Yuu-chan...you're the person who I said is very special to me...I told your friends I wasn't comfortable talking about that sort of subject because if I said anything revolving around the person I liked...I feared I'd accidentally make it obvious I was talking about you." f/n paused to take a deep breath. "I...did mean it when I told Akira you're the one I want to always rely on...you've always been there for me, s-so...uhm...I-I guess what I'm saying i-is..." 

 

Yuu likes to think it's usually him that becomes flustered any time he gets near f/n, typically feels his face turn several degrees hotter, and sure, f/n is on the shy side sometimes but never has he seen him blush so brightly...or really blush at all. Seeing it for a first himself, and knowing it's because of him, Yuu is getting more choked up than when it was his turn to confess. And what did f/n say? "if I said anything revolving around the person I liked...I feared I'd accidentally make it obvious I was talking about you". Yuu's hopes were skyrocketed into outer-space as he tried to pay attention to every single word f/n said. At this rate, Yuu really does think what f/n will say next is;

 

"I-I...like you, too...Yuu-chan." f/n spat out. "I didn't know if you felt the same...which is why I didn't--" Yuu didn't want anything else being said, nonetheless a stretched "but". He grasped f/n's uniform's collar then lunged his body upward. Successfully, Yuu got what he wanted. Their lips were a perfect match the way they fit together like they were two puzzle pieces neither wanted to complete if it meant ending this moment. f/n unsurely held Yuu's sides, still shocked Yuu actually kissed him. This all still feels like it isn't real...they both confessed they love each other, then Yuu kissed f/n. It's nuts, but of fucking course they're both extremely happy. Sadly, they did have a silent, mutual agreement they can't spend the rest of the day making out. 

 

` ` `

 

One of them should say something, though, so keeping his hands where they are Yuu pressed his forehead against f/n's chest. "I love you, f/n-san." His smile showed the genuine happiness bubbling inside his stomach. "I'm sorry for taking so long telling you, I just let my fear of you rejecting me get in the way...heh, stupid, I know~" Closing his eyes from letting out a short laugh caused a couple tears he tried holding back escape down his cheek. 

 

"I don't think it's stupid." f/n smiled, too, bringing up a hand to pet Yuu's soft hair. Very soft. "Why do you think I haven't said anything?" Right, it was what f/n was saying before Yuu "interrupted". "Anyway, don't worry about it. You're still the person who had the plan on confessing to me today while I only got the courage because Akira kept pushing me to do it all day." In a way, he should thank Akira. Without his meddling, it wouldn't put the idea in Yuu's and f/n's head there _is_ a possibility the other reciprocates romantic feelings giving both 100% motivation they should get their confession over and done with. "S-sorry, I know this all might feel awkward again...~" f/n took his turn nervously laughing. "I never...uhm..." It's weird just to say the word. " _Dated_ before, or at least never had a confession said to me. I'm a little overwhelmed." 

 

"It's fine." Yuu showed f/n his smile then wrapped his arms tightly around f/n's neck. "Just...stay with me for a couple more minutes..." He does still need to go to volleyball practice at the gym. For now, he wants to savor every squeeze he gets from f/n's arms that hugged Yuu's waist. "I was thinking," Yuu muttered in confidence. "Could I come over after I finish my club? It's been a while since I've been over." 

 

"Sure." f/n closed his eyes giving Yuu one last squeeze. "I'd...really love that." Getting over their ridiculous superstitions as to why they couldn't date got in the way of what really mattered in a relationship. Pushing these fears aside and just going for it, in the end, did them better than what they originally expected. Look at them now, embracing while wearing big happy smiles. _Ryoko-chan is going to have a riot when I tell her all about this_...

 

**~*~*~**

 

"How do think it's going?" Ryuu threw his volleyball from one hand to another. He, Shoyou, and Koushi stood near the gym's entrance. "Yuu seemed pretty damn determined." Ryuu does admit he made a mistake trying to push Yuu onto f/n not thinking of either's feelings, only his own thinking it was his right as Yuu's friend. _I do hope things went well_. 

 

"I don't know. I really am wishing f/n-san and Nishinoya-senpai end up together~" Shoyou acted extremely optimistic. "I think it is safe to say there's a chance for them. They have gotten close over time and if f/n-san already puts this much trust into Nishinoya-senpai, I'm sure he feels the exact same way." Although he and Ryuu are still worried about that guy Koushi told them f/n was with. Speaking of whom, Koushi crossed his arms and sighed. 

 

 _I should tell them_...Guilt has been tugging at his heart all day and since it should be over soon, it would be safe to tell Ryuu and Shoyou without fearing they'd mess everything up by revealing un-needed information. "Tanaka-san, Hinata-san, I need to tell you guys something regarding that male I told you was with f/n-kun." They stared at Koushi. 

 

"What is it, Sugawara-senpai?" Koushi rubbed the back of his neck. 

 

"Uhm...I kind of lied to you two and Nishinoya-san about who f/n-kun was with...mainly Nishinoya-san." Immediately Ryuu's and Shoyou's attention were focused on Koushi. "The guy's name is Akira-san. f/n-kun introduced us and they're actually brothers. I didn't say anything because I thought if Nishinoya-san kept that same jealousy toward Akira-san it'd finally give him the courage to confess." Scrunching his eyebrows upward Koushi looked back at his friends. "I knew it was a risk, and I shouldn't have lied...but I really did think it would work out well in the end." Koushi isn't a fan of liars or lying which is why it was so hard for him to do this. And thinking back, thinking the way Yuu got affected, Koushi realizes further he should have stuck to the truth, possibly cheering up Yuu with the good news f/n wasn't already in a relationship that would then give him the proper confidence to confess.

 

"They're brothers?!" Koushi seriously changed the entire story of Akira and f/n in the hope it'd make Yuu confess to f/n? Honestly, Shoyou and Ryuu do think was a plausible plan, but Yuu cried like they never seen him cry before, almost completely giving up hope on f/n and probably love or happiness forever. Then again...Yuu had a turnaround. "Suga-san, don't you realize what you could have--" The gym doors opened but the person sneaking inside tried not to be too loud; he already knows once Sawamura catches him he'll be in for some REAL hell...

 

"N-Nishinoya-senpai...!" The three boys hurried over, Shoyou running the fastest. "Senpai, are you...okay?" He hesitantly asked. "You took a while, and..." They all tensed noticing how red Yuu's eyes were, except once they moved their eyes downward to Yuu's lips, their eyes widened. 

 

"Yuu, did you tell him?" Yuu looked up at his friends. He had his usual big grin stretched out farther crossing his arms over his puffed out chest.

 

"Let's just say...I'm finally _seeing_ someone~"


	7. Special [PART 1]

 

 

**EDIT 03/31/2019, 2:57 P.M.**   
**This chapter was originally published a year ago but as I recently began continuing this "Special" series in this book I changed some things in this that have a major play in the new side-plot going on.**

 

* * *

 

Their hands were tightly intertwined and their lips were pressed together intensely. They've been in this position for a couple of minutes now since every time f/n would try to back away, Yuu would immediately reconnect their lips. This was a bit out of character. They both were still getting used to doing this sort of thing, even though they're already two months in their relationship, but today Yuu has been a lot more affectionate and willing to have their hands held at all times and give f/n a kiss whenever he had the chance to. f/n didn't know what was going on to make Yuu act this way, but he can only hope its for a good reason like he is trying to have it be where they can be casual when showing affection for each other. "I-I want us to eat lunch alone tomorrow," Yuu whispered. His eyes were cast to the side and his cheeks glowed a dark red hue. 

 

"Again?" f/n squeezed around Yuu's fingers. "We've been...eating alone together a lot, lately. I-its not that I don't want to be with you, but don't you think your friends' feelings will get hurt if you keep leaving them out to be with me?" He's visited the gym a couple of times while Yuu would be practicing for upcoming tournaments or mock competitions between _'Karasuno'_  and other schools, and each time Yuu's friends were really nice to f/n. They didn't ask too many questions about being blind or his relationship with f/n, but when they did, f/n didn't mind answering them. He had a great time talking to them, but there was still some anxiety in his stomach. These people are characters f/n have never gotten a chance to study, and it doesn't help that f/n never been that comfortable around people in general. Ryoko and Yuu were the first. _I'd think I'd die if one of Yuu-chan's friends claimed I was distracting him or getting in the way_... "I-I think tomorrow you should invite some of your friends to eat with us. O-or if you wanted, I could stay in my classroom while you go and eat with them." 

 

Yuu's lips twitched. He didn't want f/n to be alone...though, at the same time, a complicated situation is going on where he doesn't want f/n around his friends. There's a reason -- two reasons -- behind Yuu's strange actions recently he really wants to talk to f/n about. Its...it's just so confusing and shocking Yuu wouldn't know how to bring it up. He's never been in a relationship before, he's never felt the need to sit down and think these type of things. Now that he's dating f/n...everything is brand new. "N-no, I wouldn't want you to be left alone." Yuu wrapped his arms around f/n's neck. "I'm sorry for being clingy..." He kept whispering. "I've been...having some problems recently and I just want to be with you for a while..." f/n frowned at this. 

 

"What's wrong?" f/n's arms securely held Yuu's waist. He's honestly glad Yuu is the one who brought up his current mental state. "Is there anything I can do? I'm always all ears." Yuu's nails dug into f/n's uniform jacket as the question caused everything bothering Yuu swimming around inside his mind all at once. His heart dropped to the very bottom of his stomach, the words he _desperately_ wished he could spit out getting caught in his throat. It was getting hard to breathe. 

 

"U-uhm..." Yuu's grip tightened. "Wh-what would you do...i-if you found out someone else was in love with you?" 

 

"W-what?" Yuu squeezed his eyes shut. Just answer the question, he mentally screamed at f/n. He knows the question will sound stupid out of context and he'd interrogate Yuu why he suddenly asked something like that. An answer is all he needs right now and eventually, he'll gather the courage to tell f/n the full story. "Yuu-chan, you know I love you, and I wouldn't leave you for anyone else." f/n slipped a small smile. "Dummy, if this is what's been nagging at you, then I'll tell you right now so you won't have any more doubts," He pushed Yuu back a bit to make his hands fall off f/n's shoulders then softly cupped Yuu's face f/n brought back in front of his. f/n's lips grazed Yuu's cheeks as he whispered lovingly, "You're my everything, okay?" He kissed Yuu's cheeks his thumbs caressed. "I love you. You're the only person who I'd ever put this much trust and faith into. There's nothing you could ever do to make me _stop_ loving you, and no matter how jealous you get or how grumpy you get, I'll be here to shower you with affection." Yuu hid his face against f/n's chest the moment after f/n gave him a final, charming smile. He covered his steaming face from all the cheesy words f/n told him; it still made warmth spread throughout his chest. "There, feel better~?" 

 

Yuu nodded. It made him happy f/n said all that...however, his problems lingered. f/n said all of that because he doesn't know what Yuu asked was something currently going on. _A-and who it is makes it all the more...frustrating_... There is someone out there in love with f/n...It hurt when he found out. If f/n weren't blind and acted sociably, Yuu wouldn't be surprised if there were a conga line of girls after f/n. 

 

Except, the person crushing on f/n is a boy. 

 

There is another _male_  out there who shares Yuu's feelings toward f/n and wants to be his boyfriend. Yuu can't do anything about changing their feelings since they do have a right to have a crush on who they please, on anyone they think is fitting for them. Maybe, if this person was someone else, Yuu wouldn't have that much of a problem. By now, he'd be telling f/n "there's this person who likes you" and they'd talk this out like mature adults. Unfortunately, _this_ is who is in love with f/n, someone Yuu knows, someone Yuu sees as one of his closest friends...and they love f/n. "I-I love you too...f/n-san..." 

 

**~*~*~**

 

 _I-I...could never tell him the other reason I'm upset, either_...

 

"Yo, Yuu! Earth to Yuu!" Oh, right, the school day had ended. Yuu was spacing out re-thinking his entire conversation with f/n earlier today. He didn't feel any better -- in fact, Yuu feels a whole lot worse. Yuu thought after hearing f/n's answer he could bring himself to admitting everything, but he deflated. The entire rest of the lunch period he spent in f/n's arms not saying a single word. "What's up? You've been a lot quieter than usual." A throbbing tic mark appeared over Ryuu's forehead. "Don't tell me f/n-san did something." Yuu felt like letting out a short chuckle. Every time Yuu feels down Ryuu assumes it's because of f/n and becomes really fired up. Really, at any given time Yuu mentions his name Ryuu is ready to take action by tracking down f/n like his life depended on it. He's even been asking all sorts of questions, hilariously becoming over-prepared.

 

"No, f/n-san didn't do anything..." Yuu sighed. He did have some time to calm himself down. "I'll tell you while we're walking to the gym." Ryuu nodded hesitantly.

 

**~*~*~**

 

"W-wait! Y-you're telling me...S-Suga-senpai plans on taking f/n-san away from you-- ack!"

 

"Don't shout it!" Yuu elbowed Ryuu's stomach. "A-and I never said he was going to take f/n-kun away from me...he...all Suga-senpai said was he loved him then he...walked away." No explanation or reasoning. After they were leaving the gym late at night Yuu noticed something was wrong with Koushi and he decided to ask, and that's when he straight out admitted he's in love with f/n. When Yuu tried asking if Koushi planned on confessing to f/n, he left him standing at the gym's front entrance. Not even a "goodbye" or an apology. 

 

"He...didn't say anything else?" Yuu shook his head. 

 

"Just, 'I love f/n-kun'. I wanted more information, but he left." 

 

Ryuu crossed his arms over his chest. "Suga-senpai...he and f/n-san don't see each other much. The only time they meet is when f/n-san eats lunch with us or comes to our after-school activities once in a while." Yuu admits it doesn't add up as to how Koushi could develop feelings for f/n -- they don't see each other often enough, unless somehow they run into each other outside of school, but f/n probably would've said something. _What are you doing?_  "I swear, Suga-senpai is always surprising me." 

 

"I-it's...scary thinking Senpai loves f/n-san...a-and what it means for us." f/n doesn't see himself in a very bright light, often calls himself boring and an open book, he isn't social so there would be no secrets to keep that'll cause drama or beef between two other students. But all that could change if he finds out he's loved by someone other than Yuu, an ego could erect. "A-and..." Yuu's blush returned darker than ever. "I-I'm...y-you see...Senpai's feelings added to another problem I'm going through...uhm..." He inhaled sharply before he continued speaking in a low mutter. "R-recently, I've been thinking a-about f/n-san a-a lot...b-but...th-those thoughts...i-involve us...t-t- _together_..." _I can't say it all!_  It's too embarrassing telling his own best friend, how would he tell f/n this is what's on his mind? 

 

"U-uhm...right." Ryuu rubbed his neck turning away from where his friend walked. "I can see why you're feeling troubled with... _that_ ," contact-embarrassment bubbled listening to his friend say these things as well as frustration. "Though, what do they have to do with Senpai?" 

 

"Th-the thing is, I don't know if I'm having these thoughts b-because we're at a point in our relationship where we should discuss this sort of thing...o-or," Yuu's so selfish, isn't he? "If I want to do it...b-because Senpai loves f/n-san and I want to do something that shows I'm the one who is dating him...th-that he's mine and no one else's." No wonder he's having trouble: his thoughts are nothing but selfish desires. Intimacy...it really is a huge step, especially if its the first time you're doing it. He's not considering f/n's feelings. He's using him to prove a stupid point. "I...I don't want to treat our relationship like a joke. I-I really do love f/n-san -- I'd never do anything that'd hurt him."

 

"Yuu..." _I don't know what I should say...I'm not in the right position to give him any advice_. Relationships are something Ryuu never got. Finding out Yuu fell in love with someone, he was scared and confused himself, but he still cheered his friend on. Months have passed, and Yuu's and f/n's relationship reached a peak Ryuu fully doesn't get and has entered a personal hell enacting a major part connected to the main story that is _their_ relationship. "Well," Ryuu sighed, "ff you've been thinking about being intimate with f/n-san way before you found out Suga-senpai's feelings then you should already have your answer." Despite his conflicted feelings, Ryuu is happy for them. He knows f/n is nice, treats Yuu with the love and adoration he deserves, and Yuu is very happy. That is what will make everything hurt the most. "You should talk to Suga-senpai and then f/n-san. You deserve answers and f/n-san deserves to know what's going on." Ryuu stuffed his forming fists deep inside his pockets. "I'll be here if you need any other help."

 

"Thanks, Ryuu. You're...y-you're right." They're a couple. They should talk to each other and find out an answer **together**. "It'll be scary...b-but for f/n-san, I'll do it~!" Yuu managed a determined smile. _I'll do anything for you, f/n-san! Always have your trust in me!_


	8. Special [PART 2]

_A tired sigh escaped Koushi's lips. It's been a busy week, to say the least for him. It's still Thursday, and Koushi never felt so relieved for the end of the day. Except, there's still volleyball practice. Usually, he'd be enveloped by overbearing joy. He loved volleyball, yet currently, he didn't want to go anywhere near the gym...because of Yuu. Koushi realizes managing a fake smile around him won't work forever. He understands it's horrible he tries avoiding his own long-time friend, but it's even more horrible re-evaluating the reason behind Koushi's recent actions. Only a matter of time before Koushi does something he'll regret, Yuu, or worse, f/n would ultimately realize Koushi's malicious thoughts that have been affecting his usual kind-hearted nature. "What am I going to do...?" Koushi grumbled. The gym neared. He stared ahead at the building and soon he stopped his tracks after he noticed two figures standing by the building's entrance stairway._

 

_Yuu and f/n._

 

 _They were talking, one of their hands tightly intertwined while Yuu blushed every time he'd look at f/n or their connected hands. Koushi involuntarily frowned a great deal witnessing their happy moment. Why must this jealousy burn inside of him? He has only himself to blame. They were happy, in love when they didn't know their own feelings for each other. Koushi almost ruined their chances before by lying to Yuu -- although at that time, Koushi did it to_ help _Yuu and f/n and...Koushi didn't love f/n. Now is different. Yuu and f/n are deeply in love; they're perfect together. Koushi cannot get in between them for his own selfish reasons -- his romantic feelings causing this erratic desperation toward f/n while he's happily dating another person are beyond actions of selfishness he repeatedly feels ashamed having twisted his heart violently around._

 

_Koushi ignored his thoughts. Just...stop thinking about it. There are more important things he should take care of, so he continued walking toward the gym. "I'll be right back, f/n-san." Koushi swallowed watching Yuu walk away. Hearing his footsteps f/n would think it's another member walking into the gym without saying a word, he isn't obliged to say hi to f/n._

 

_But..._

 

_"f/n-kun." f/n's head shot up and turned in the direction Koushi's voice came from. Said male appeared fairly close to f/n though kept his distance; he doesn't want f/n hearing his rapid heart-race. "Hear for another practice?" He's been listening to them playing a lot recently. Koushi didn't mind since it'd give him chances to talk to the other, hear his voice and be near his presence. He would almost forget there were always additional people surrounding them and possibly expose Koushi's romantic interest in f/n._

 

_"Heh, yeah." f/n smile sent Koushi's heart fluttering. "Yuu-chan has been persistent lately, and I've been enjoying talking the team. They're all really nice."_

 

_"I noticed you've been coming out of your shell lately."_

 

_"I guess. Yuu-chan kind of made it his goal to help me make friends." Koushi frowned heavily. "It's still weird. I've never talked to a lot of people other than Yuu-chan, my family, and those in my classroom. Meeting you, Hinata-kun, and Tanaka-senpai made me nervous as all Hell alone. But Yuu-chan helped me through it." Stop saying his name, it makes Koushi's blood boil. "I'm really grateful I met him." He can't blame f/n or Yuu, they're oblivious to Koushi's feelings and the way he thinks of f/n -- love, adoration -- and Yuu -- envy, jealousy, resentment -- they don't have a single idea someone they believe is a trusted friend is secretly representing disgraceful scenes a friend shouldn't be conveying during a supposedly happy occasion._

 

_"I'm happy for you two~" Koushi managed out through his upside down lips._

 

_"Actually, I'm kind of grateful for you, too."_

 

_"Wha--" Koushi looked at f/n shocked, his pale cheeks lighting up. What did f/n mean by that? "I-I didn't do anything! I-I just talked to you--"_

 

_"Exactly." f/n's smile brightened. "It honestly wasn't until you talked to me about Yuu-chan did I realize I had to be honest with my feelings, show him I was thankful for everything he's done. At least telling him I love him was all I could think, and it turned out it's exactly what I needed." It is because of Koushi they're together. From the beginning, Koushi caught onto Yuu's feelings, f/n's possible conflicted feelings, lied to Yuu to push him into facing f/n. It's because of Koushi he lost the battle he entered too late. "You're the reason I found happiness, Senpai." Even with these reflections, Koushi blushed from f/n's words._

 

_"I...wouldn't go that far."_

 

At least, that's how everyone else will view this dramatic situation if the word starts spreading around their love triangle; a heartfelt romantic-comedy about two friends in love with the same boy whom only loves one person, the main rival character. Everything continuously fell downhill the longer these beliefs stay active, going on too long will cause unnecessary events that'll bring more trouble than it'll control, and worst of all, their entire friendship will completely get demolished because of one thing leading to another. And it isn't right. Nobody is really considering Yuu's feelings and what position he's been put under where he is losing all his trust in someone he considered a mentor, a friend he can look up to and believe every word he says, and worst of all, an innocent man who has done nothing wrong. 

 

 _I-it isn't right_. Desperate feet slammed against the dirt covered ground. Dust formed small clouds following each rushed footstep approaching the innocent victim who fell down the hardest under their heavy situation. "Sugawara-senpai!" The loud, hopeless voice luckily was heard and ever so carefully Koushi stopped walking then turned where the real selfish person he tried protecting from facing what he's done stood before him panting heavily.  _I might cause more problems than needed,_  however doing nothing won't fix anything either unless he steps up and clears that innocent man's name.

 

"Tanaka-kun." Koushi's eye-lids drooped due to nothing other than Ryuu's immediate tears running down his cheeks. Just what would happen if the true perpetrator's identity gets revealed? Perhaps things will become worse, Yuu will continue suffering from being dragged left-to-right by these doubts whether this person is my true friend or if I can no longer trust anyone I once did before my life was destroyed by persistent deceptions.

 

"Senpai..."  _and_   _I'll only feel sadder, too_. "W-why did you say you liked f/n-kun?" His lips started quivering. His hands shook by his sides remembering every word his best friend shared mentioning Koushi in a light Ryuu rightfully owns. "Wh-why...why didn't you just say it was me...you knew who loves f/n-kun?"

 

**~*~*~**

 

Yuu's eyes expressed evident disappointment f/n couldn't catch. "You have to stay after school? For what?" He grabbed f/n's hands possessively. f/n's own expression twisted into a regretful stare as he apologetically smiled down where he believed Yuu's face is exactly located beneath him.

 

"I'm sorry, Yuu-chan, but my teacher asked me if I'd be willing to start an after-school program. I thought it might be extremely helpful so I agreed." f/n squeezed Yuu's hands back signifying his understanding of Yuu's anxiety Yuu also worries it might make him seem clingy. "Tuesdays and Thursdays I have free, and there's still the weekends." He leaned closer, "come on, you have your volleyball practice everyday anyways. Don't get so down, I can tell you're frowning." Whatever Yuu is fearing f/n wants nothing more than to persuade his adoring boyfriend there's nothing he should stress over while they're apart. The love sparking inside of them proves enough they won't betray one another, they love each other enough separating sends undeniable concern whether their partner is safe without them present.

 

It isn't as if Yuu doesn't agree, either. He trusts f/n but constantly remembering his very own Senpai holds romantic feelings for  _his_  partner. It's...past jealousy stirring his insides; self-doubt, insecurity, etcetera -- those replaced resentments for Koushi's feelings Yuu tried telling himself aren't illegal (Yuu can still admit there's some jealousy alive). 

 

f/n slowly released Yuu's hands and placed them around his waist, briefly halting midway. Yuu, equally flustered, held onto f/n's shoulders his fingernails clawed. _f/n-san_ , Yuu's cheeks burned red having their hips make direct contact as his heart fastly beat against f/n's chest, his blush only grew sensing f/n smiling. "f-f/n...san..." he breathed out quietly before kissing f/n again. Yuu wrapped his arms all around f/n's neck pulling him deeper in their make-out chanting:  _f/n-san_ ,  _f/n-san_ ,  _f-f/n-san...I want to keep feeling you,_ broadcasting impossible warmth across his chest. Yuu's hands gripped f/n's neck and hair almost ripping out the follicles by their routes. _T-touch me too, f/n-san_ , his rushing mind wanted f/n's hands to travel down his body until his bigger hands wholly cupped Yuu's bottom, possibly lift him up onto a desk or even the wall--

 

"Mhm, Y-Yuu-chan, you're...going a little aggressive." f/n broke their extremely heated kiss off. Face twisting Yuu realized what was because of pain. 

 

"I-I'm sorry!" He backed far away creating an immoderate distance between themselves. "I-I...I didn't mean to..."  _What did I do?_  Unthinkable humiliation filled Yuu's conscious grasping the actions he just recently performed -- inside  _'Karasuno's_ ' school hallways where someone could've possibly caught their inappropriate behavior. "I-I'm sorry, f/n-san...I-I don't know what's...I-I'm so sorry..."

 

"Hey, hey, Yuu, it's alright." Yuu looked up at him shocked then looked down at his hand he presented. Shyly Yuu accepted it. "Yuu, listen to me, okay?" Without warning f/n tugged his boyfriend back against his chest, abruptly hugging him close displaying his sentiments of always here to protect Yuu whenever he needs it. "I have to go now, but the second you're finished with your club come over my house. There, you can talk my ear off about what's going on because I hate seeing you distressed." As soon as Yuu found his breath f/n released him. "Promise me you'll call."

 

"Okay, I-I promise." f/n grasped his classroom's doorknob giving Yuu one final wave goodbye. Yuu clutched his school bag's strap officially no longer next to his partner, and soon enough he'll face his unexpected rival inside the one place he feels truly comfortable (he considers f/n's home another safe place he can be his real self but he isn't capable of playing volleyball there) now tainted by this unforeseen circumstance. _It's not as if I can be mean to Senpai,_  Yuu thought, making his way out of the school.  _As far as I know, he hasn't done anything to show he intends on seducing f/n-san. Maybe it is just a harmful crush and it doesn't mean our friendship has to end_. Koushi is still exceptionally kind, there's no chance he'd spontaneously kiss f/n or demand they date. Really, Koushi could possibly be beating himself up too viciously for his corrupted feelings and is trying his best to forget them since he obviously knows they're happily dating without any problems appearing.  _Worst comes to worst, I'll simply confront Senpai_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally, it was going to be Sugawara being in love with f/n, but as I started coming back to writing this 2nd chapter I thought, "but that actually doesn't make much sense" so, as you can see, I switched some things around (because of this major change I also edited the 1st Special chapter, mainly during Tanaka's and Nishinoya's conversation.
> 
> And if you're wondering why that whole memory, in the beginning, was still there is because deleting meant there'd be a lot more content I'd have to introduce that I didn't want to deal with. Instead, I molded my away around it :P


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